Little lessons

A couple little lessons over the last few days. Not new ones, but good ones.

1. Where God is, I am home. He is in me, I am in him. When I remain aware of this, the depth and riches of life with God astounds me. Sin is easier to resist, purposeful living seems natural, and discontent disappears.

2. I was made to love and serve God, and to love and serve the people around me. There are people who can't or won't listen to God. But they may listen to me. I am meant to stand in the gap: speaking God's words, and interceding for the people. It's a thrilling call to service. It is also nearly impossible without #1. (And just for laughs, how great is it that this is the call on the life of a two??)

Really Good blog post

Not mine, silly!

I just read a fabulous post over at 97secondswithgod, the guy who writes StuffChristiansLike. Here's the original, but I suggest you go over to the actual blog site because some of the comments are very good, too.

Hiding in Fields

I think there are a few things I'm supposed to be doing right now, one of which is writing more. I feel that 97secondswithGod, prodigaljon and stuffchristianslike, are what God wants me to focus on right now. But for a variety of reasons, all three of those sites only constitute a thin sliver of my week.

It's easy to get frustrated about that. To think, "Ugh, I have a call, I have an idea of the direction I'm supposed to be going, why am I not going at the speed I want to?" Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever thought, "I'm not were I'm supposed to be right now. I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I have more to give."

Maybe not, but that's where I'm at this morning. And while praying through that I felt like God reminded me that He's still in the business of hiding people in fields.

Which is a weird kind of reminder, but when I looked at the story of David in 1 Samuel it made sense. David didn't just receive a call or a suggestion or a "what if" from God, he was anointed King of Israel. In 1 Samuel 16:13, after he's anointed, it says, "from that day on the Spirit of the Lord came upon David in power. And then he went back to tend some sheep."

It doesn't say that last line but it should, because that's what happened. The rightful king of Israel returned to the field. Even when David becomes a member of Saul's court, it says in 1 Samuel 17:15 "but David went back and forth from Saul to tend his father's sheep in Bethlehem."

It's easy to look at our lives and think, "Why am I working here God? Why am I a part of this church or this ministry or this whatever? I should be doing great things for you! I should be starting a new, all consuming adventure with you. Right this second!"

But I think that sometimes, out of His infinite love and wisdom, God chooses to hide us in fields. Why? I don't know. Maybe he wants us to wrestle more bears before we face Goliath. Maybe He's got a really important message He wants to whisper to us and it can only be heard in the loneliness of a field. Maybe Job 23:9-10 answers this question better than I ever could:

"When he is at work in the north, I do not see him; when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him. But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold."

Maybe God has you in a field because He wants to introduce you to the world as gold.

I don't know, but I rest in the fact that I serve a God that does. I rest in the fact that I serve a God that knows exactly where I am and has a purpose for that unique spot, whether it's a field or a kingdom, a mission field or a corporate meeting.

Amen.

the benediction

Aside from Warren praying " in the name of the one who changed my life – Yeshua, Isa, Jesus, Jesús," I think this was absolutely the best:

God of our weary years, God of our silent tears, thou, who has brought us thus far along the way, thou, who has by thy might led us into the light, keep us forever in the path we pray, lest our feet stray from the places, our God, where we met thee, lest our hearts drunk with the wine of the world, we forget thee.

Shadowed beneath thy hand, may we forever stand true to thee, oh God, and true to our native land.

We truly give thanks for the glorious experience we’ve shared this day.

We pray now, oh Lord, for your blessing upon thy servant Barack Obama, the 44th president of these United States, his family and his administration.

He has come to this high office at a low moment in the national, and indeed the global, fiscal climate. But because we know you got the whole world in your hands, we pray for not only our nation, but for the community of nations.

Our faith does not shrink though pressed by the flood of mortal ills.

For we know that, Lord, you are able and you’re willing to work through faithful leadership to restore stability, mend our brokenness, heal our wounds, and deliver us from the exploitation of the poor, of the least of these, and from favoritism toward the rich, the elite of these.

We thank you for the empowering of thy servant, our 44th president, to inspire our nation to believe that yes we can work together to achieve a more perfect union.

And while we have sown the seeds of greed — the wind of greed and corruption, and even as we reap the whirlwind of social and economic disruption, we seek forgiveness and we come in a spirit of unity and solidarity to commit our support to our president by our willingness to make sacrifices, to respect your creation, to turn to each other and not on each other.

And now, Lord, in the complex arena of human relations, help us to make choices on the side of love, not hate; on the side of inclusion, not exclusion; tolerance, not intolerance.

And as we leave this mountain top, help us to hold on to the spirit of fellowship and the oneness of our family. Let us take that power back to our homes, our workplaces, our churches, our temples, our mosques, or wherever we seek your will.

Bless President Barack, First Lady Michelle. Look over our little angelic Sasha and Malia.

We go now to walk together as children, pledging that we won’t get weary in the difficult days ahead. We know you will not leave us alone.

With your hands of power and your heart of love, help us then, now, Lord, to work for that day when nations shall not lift up sword against nation, when tanks will be beaten into tractors, when every man and every woman shall sit under his or her own vine and fig tree and none shall be afraid, when justice will roll down like waters and righteousness as a mighty stream.

Lord, in the memory of all the saints who from their labors rest, and in the joy of a new beginning, we ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get in back, when brown can stick around … when yellow will be mellow … when the red man can get ahead, man; and when white will embrace what is right. That all those who do justice and love mercy say Amen.

(Transcript from the AP)

Love it. And while I watched most of the inauguration from Kilroy's with my CGroup girls, we watched this last bit at the PourHouse, and the looks on the faces around me for that last paragraph were just priceless.

Calvinists Gone Wild!

I stayed with my "adopted" family over break, and so much do they consider me family that they kicked me out of the guest room and onto the couch so they could host "real" guests for New Year's.

The guests were Joelle and her betrothed, Jeff. Joelle is an old friend of Renee's, one about whom I've heard lots of hysterical "when we were teenagers at Wesleyan summer camp" stories. Renee has always described Joelle as a crazy liberal because she "doesn't believe in hell" and eschews gendered pronouns when talking about God.

After a lovely family dinner, the kids scattered and Renee began to grill Jeff to find out if he is as crazy as Joelle. As the conversation progressed, I began asking questions, too. An edited overview:

Q: So Jeff, are you as weird as Joelle? Do you believe in hell or not?
A: Well I don't really think that hell is a place. I think hell is separation from God. I don't think we can say for sure that the afterlife is a place. And I don't really think there's a need for hell.

Q: Do you believe in heaven?
A: Like I said, I think that we are resurrected into God's presence after we die, but I don't necessarily think that we'll have bodies or form as we understand them now. So no, I don't really believe in heaven the way you mean the word.

Q: What do you mean by 'there's no need for hell'? What about sin?
A: The Bible talks about the elect being the ones God has specially chosen, but we're all God's children. God doesn't love some of us more than others. We're all part of the elect. Everyone is saved, no matter what choices they make.

Q: So you believe that all people are fully sanctified when they're resurrected into God's presence after death?
A: Yes.

Q: So then what's the point of following God now?
A: Well, it's a good way to live. It makes God happy; we live righteously to please God and be in relationship with God.

Q: Okay, if we're all going to be perfect and with God after death, what was the point of Christ?
A: Christ came to teach us about God. He also came to teach God about us: God didn't fully understand what it was like to be human until he became one, just like you can't understand what it's like to be a parent until you are one.

Q: So you say Christ came to teach us about God. If he hadn't come, would that have changed the fact that we'll all be resurrected and sanctified with God in the afterlife?
A: That's an interesting question. No one's ever asked me that before. I'd have to think about it.

Q: Just for kicks, am I right in thinking that you'd say that sanctification and homosexuality have absolutely nothing to do with one another?
A: Yes.

That's about where the conversation got cut off. My next question would have been "Do you think that other revelations of God, in Muhammad and Buddha and such, are on equal footing with the revelation that came through Christ? My guess is that he would say yes, because his son was quite vocal about how Muslims, Jews, and Christians all worship the same God.

Q: What was the scariest part of this conversation?
A: Jeff and Joelle are both pastors in a mainline Christian denomination.

Women

I've had some conversations about women lately. Women as friends, women's ministries, women as singles and girlfriends and wives. The irritating way women laugh and sigh together in large groups when someone tells a story about a child. The moments like in Sleepless in Seattle where Meg Ryan and Rosie O'Donnell finish the quote together about the refrigerator with the big red bow.

My mom has a group of friends, the "Udders," who collect cow-themed kitsch, vacation together, and always meet to play Canasta during the Superbowl, pausing only long enough to watch the commercials. She also has the "Yas," a small group of post-Girl-Scout friends with whom she shares motherhood and middle age and life.

I don't have my well-defined groups yet, and I don't really see the need for titles. But I've got my B-ton girls, and my girls from undergrad with whom we always have to share at least two nights--one with husbands, one without. My hometown friends have scattered, but they're always there.

All this reflecting is really just me being thankful. And it was inspired by this video, which made me cry but was totally worth the five minutes.

All things work together

Back when my life was really really crummy, when I walked around waiting for the next giant shoe to drop and glowering at God for engineering the deconstruction of my world (in other words, in middle school), my biggest question was Why?

Back when I wrestled with Nietzsche in the mornings, watched protesters bash my country in the evenings, slept through as much of life as possible but was always awoken by the friend who's existential crisis was worse than mine, my biggest question was Why?

When my loved ones die, when I hear about world news, when I observe the hurting lives of people that are precious to me, it's the same thing. Why?

Why is this happening?
Why are You letting this happen?
Why, if you are good and loving and worthy of my worship, is the world like this?

I really mean: Don't You care? How am I supposed to believe that You are who You say You are when the world isn't the way You say it should be? How can I trust a "good" God if my life when I'm with Him doesn't strike me as very "good"? Why would I follow a God like that?


We've all been there. When we ask people about it, the answer is usually something about free will, about how God lets the world get crappy because he gives us each the ability to make our own choices. It doesn't comfort me very much.

When I ask God about it, his answer is usually something like "I love you." Depending on my level of patience, that may or may not feel helpful. (As I've posted before, forcing myself to be thankful helps my attitude in that situation.)

My dear Renee used to tell me over and over how we just have to wait, that God makes good on his promise to work all things together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28) In the middle of a crisis, it's easy to sneer at that. But a little life experience has taught me that God's good to keep that promise. I can see the way he's done it simply by reading my Bible... stories of Him working good from people's crap is all over Israel's history, and it's pretty much the key theme of Jesus' death and resurrection.

But honestly, sometimes it helps just as much or more to look at my own life and think about how he's turned my own circumstances into good. Salvation, yes. Also the way I've been able to minister to people in rough circumstances because I've literally gone through those same rough circumstances. Even the way I've become one of those awkwardly blunt people who're not afraid to talk about pretty much anything. The way I've learned to deal with things head-on, at least much of the time. I am the person I am because of the crap I've gone through. And also because God is the one who got me through all of it, and who has used me since then to minister to people.

I met a friend today who is in the middle of asking all of those Whys. And today I'm thankful that I've lived long enough and been given faith enough to see and believe in the Light at the end of that tunnel.

Happy New Year!

Sorry if you were looking for a New Year themed post, but this isn't it. Happy New Year, though.

I've been reminded lately of how much music helps give a voice to my thoughts. It also reminds me of truth at times when I'm deaf to the words of the Bible, my teachers, and my friends.

Lately my fall-back comfort tunes have been the reassuring ones like "Oh, How He Loves Us." A great tune. I recently rediscovered Skillet, too, and while my friend Flora and I drove and talked from Indy to Buffalo, we listened to their self-titled album at least six or seven times. Over the last couple days, chock full of the thick drama that is life at home, I've had their song "Safe With You" on repeat. So here are some awesome lyrics for your perusing pleasure, and if you're in the mood for a listen, check out the song too.

Learning inside
I will be safe with you tonight
You cause the smile
And the teardrops in my eyes
Locked inside your every movement
Will I stand or will I fall?
Trapped inside of your walls of glory
I am just as dead leaves fall

Safe with you
Safe with you

Chaos in my head
The whole universe is at rest
When I'm in your arms
Is when I feel the best
Locked inside your creative being
Whirling about your unfailing truth
Attacked with power by ferocious love
Salvation alone belongs to you

Safe with you
Safe with you

Lifting up my voice
To the God who really sees
The God who is consumed
With loving thoughts of me
The screaming winds
And the crashing of the oceans
Shifting sands and the changing of the seasons
As I stand in awe and wonder
Nothing in the world has prepared me for you!

Jesus, Jesus, I'm safe with you

Stay tuned for thoughts on a very interesting conversation I had on New Year's Eve. Calvinism revisited, with rather startling conclusions. Fun, fun, fun!